Today would have been my dad's 76th birthday. It's hard for me to believe that he's been gone for more than 17 years now. It seems yesterday that I saw him last, and yet it's been that long. How many lifes have I lived during that time? How many mistakes have I made that maybe I wouldn't have if I had been able to go to him for advice? How many joyous moments have I lived that he wasn't able to see? How many sad things have happened in the family that I'm glad he didn't have to experience? How many times have I just wanted to sit and read the paper together, just one more time? To talk to him about the current election, and get his thoughts and opinions. And to tell him about the kids' latest accomplishments, and see his pride.
Losing him so young changed me in many ways. In ways, I'm stronger from having had to deal with it, and in many ways weaker. I wonder at times how different my life would be had he lived. How different a person I would be for having had a father for longer than I did.
I see him some days in his grandsons, and even in myself. In good ways and in bad. He was a good man, but still a man. It took a long time for me to be able to take him off the pedestal I put him on when he died, and see him as he was, all the good and the bad.
I miss you dad, today, and every day. I'll see you again one day, and the things that I have to tell you, you're just not going to believe!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Thinking about you. Love you.
Post a Comment